Even if your marriage didn’t work out, if you have kids you still have to be a good parent. This means being there for them in many ways, including financially, socially, physically, spiritually, etc.
Yes, if you and your ex no longer live together and don’t share custody, you will have to follow certain rules, but you can’t let this one go.
A lot of people leave and try to find a way back in, but they aren’t any better. Then how will you get in if the mother has custody and is paying for everything?
It’s not fair to the woman who did all the work or to the kids whose hopes are raised and then dashed. You may not have been the best husband, but please don’t joke about what kind of father you are.
If you’re right, the average woman will agree (after she’s gotten over the pain of the divorce, of course) and even like having someone to share the responsibilities with, so you’d get the access you want.
As a father, it hurts to have to follow rules, but that’s one of the bad things about getting a divorce. But if you and your ex act like adults, there’s no reason why you can’t be polite and maybe even friendly. Even though it has happened, it doesn’t mean you should get back together, but at least you can be good parents together.
Consider it. Reach out, be nice, be mature, act like a person, and stay the same. Things will improve.