The Role of Mothers and Mothers-in-Law in Protecting Marriages
Marriage is a delicate union, built on love, respect, and trust. When a son or daughter marries, their spouse becomes part of the family — and every interaction, especially with in-laws, can strengthen or strain that bond. One area that often causes tension is when well-meaning mothers or mothers-in-law bring personal spiritual practices into the couple’s life.
While a mother’s desire to protect and support her child is natural, wisdom is needed in how this support is expressed. If your child or their spouse faces challenges — whether in childbirth, finances, misunderstandings, or other difficulties — the best first step is to pray for them privately. Taking “extra spiritual” measures, especially those unfamiliar or contrary to the spouse’s beliefs, can create suspicion and erode trust.
This is not just about religion; it’s also about perception. Candles, oils, chants, or visits to spiritualists — no matter how pure the intention — may be seen as manipulation or interference. Such actions can damage the respect the couple has for you and even cause long-term strain. Sadly, many mothers or mothers-in-law who are later labeled negatively did not set out to harm anyone; they only crossed boundaries without realizing the impact.
If your child’s spouse discovers that you have been influencing your child behind their back or taking them to seek outside “spiritual solutions” without consent, it’s almost certain to create distrust and conflict in the marriage. Instead of helping, it may speed up its breakdown.
A healthy marriage needs space, privacy, and unity. The role of parents and in-laws should be to encourage, support, and pray — but never to impose personal spiritual paths or control. Love them, guide them gently, and trust that your prayers, not secret interventions, will speak louder.
Let us choose wisdom over interference, and may peace remain in all our homes.
